In Bridget Jones: Mad About The Boy, we see Bridget fall head over heels with Roxster, a 28-year-old played by One Day star Leo Woodall.
Cue mass swooning in the cinema, with Bridget enjoying a summer of love with her younger man – who is not only alarmingly good looking, but sweet, too. And most importantly, he makes Bridget feel alive again after the loss of her husband, Mark Darcy.
Though their relationship eventually goes south (no spoilers from me regarding what happens), Bridget and Roxster make age-gap relationships look easy. In reality, it's not always the case.
© UPI"All healthy relationships experience differences around personality, social preferences and cultural references, but adding an age gap into the mix can introduce other dynamics to navigate," says Charlotte Braithwaite, a BACP registered therapist who is 12 years younger than her husband.
"Confronting age gap stereotypes can be the first common dilemma, with labels such as 'gold digger' or 'cougar' unfairly undermining genuine connections.
"This can contribute to a fear of judgement - whether from family, friends, or society - which can create pressure or self-doubt that would otherwise not come into the relationship.
"Two individuals navigating different life stages parallel to each other can mean conversations about children, career landmarks or different life-season values have to be addressed in a much more direct way," Charlotte says.
© Getty Images"One partner might want to have a baby, while the other already feels content having fulfilled their desire for children within a past relationship. Blended families can also add complexity, with differing parenting styles or stepfamily dynamics to contend with."
As someone in an age-gap relationship, Charlotte notes that just like Bridget, there are benefits to be found. "What is often not recognised with age-gap relationships is the potential for growth and learning from each other.
"Different life experiences often spark new perspectives and deeper conversations. Partners may enjoy a blend of wisdom and energy - where one offers guidance and the other brings spontaneity. These relationships can offer a rejuvenating open-mindedness, with both partners embracing and celebrating their generational differences.
"In my own experience, as a therapist who is naturally a deep thinker and emotionally curious, I found that the 12-year age gap between my husband and I allowed us to connect on a deeper level, as he was more self-aware and comfortable in his own identity having more lived experience."
READ: The Bridget Jones effect - why the 'sad spinster' image is a total myth
A friend of mine in her mid-40s is in a long-term relationship with a man who recently turned 30. When we met recently, she sung the praises of her younger man. "Older people are more stuck in their ways and inflexible. I've found that younger people have more joy for life and enthusiasm for trying new things."
If you're struggling with an age gap, read on for therapist-approved advice on minding the gap and navigating an age-gap relationship.
How to navigate an age-gap relationship
1. Communication is key
"Clear communication about how the age gap may affect the relationship is essential, especially when differences in life stages come into play," says relationship therapist Vasia Toxavidi.
Charlotte adds: "Name the age gap and share honestly: as with any relationship, fears, worries and doubts can interfere if they aren't aired.
"Being able to name the reality of the age gap can help when navigating different life goals, values and plans - especially around family and children."
ADVICE: Finding love in perimenopause: 5 ways to ace midlife dating
2. Celebrate your differences
"View generational contrasts as opportunities to learn from each other and proactively invite each other into different experiences," says Charlotte, while Vasia adds: "Embrace the differences in experiences, life stages, perspectives, and values that may arise from the age gap and use them as opportunities for growth and learning."
© Getty Images3. Remember what matters
"Focus on your core values," advises Charlotte. "There will be compromises in any relationship, but if you both align on what truly matters - age really is just a number."
READ: 3 major friction points for midlife couples – and how to handle them
4. Embrace independence
"In relationships with a larger age gap there could be things one or the other doesn't want to, or can't do, so it is important that we feel comfortable being independent and doing our own thing," says therapist Clare Patterson.
"Your relationship may not look 'traditional' in this sense, as perhaps one of the parties already has commitments in their life they need to maintain and so there may be the need for more time apart. This can often be a healthy thing though, as it means both parties are content with their independence. Coming together can be all the more meaningful for it."
Love is a process
"A relationship is a process where two people with opposite and different experiences create something new, loving and comforting together, so couples should feel hopeful that as long as there is enough love between them, they will find a way to journey through life together", says BACP registered therapist Sumeet Grover.
When it concerns potential shame and anxiety caused by society's judgement, as long as you are convinced of the love, nurture and joy that your relationship brings you, be bold and know that you have nothing to explain to others.
"There are several traditional relationships of couples of a similar age group that fail or do not work out as expected. Therefore, it is not the age, in the end, that decides the success or failure of a relationship, but it is the quality of love between two people."
To find a therapist, visit www.bacp.co.uk
