Nigella Lawson was brought to tears as she spoke about her bitter split from husband Charles Saatchi and losing a high-profile court case against former members of her staff.In an emotional appearance on Michael McIntyre's chat show, the TV cook was asked how she was feeling now those events were behind her.
"I have had better times," she admitted. "It's spring and I am feeling better and I am very happy to be here.
© Photo: BBCNigella broke down into tears on Michael McIntyre's BBC chat show
"I have been alive longer than you, so I know life has its dips and it can get better and you can't fight it.
"Nigella, 54, suddenly became the focus of intense media and public attention nine months ago when photographs were published of Charles with his hands on her throat.
"I try not to live in the public sphere very much," she said. "You have your own life and you are the person inside.
© Photo: BBCNigella: "You know life has it's dips"
"I really think if the major thing in your life is what people who don't know you think then you are living your life wrong.
"I'm not particularly guarded and I say and do some things I may regret later," she admitted. "But I would rather embarrass myself and be a bit idiotic sometimes than spend my whole life worrying about what people think.
"Nigella, who admitted in court that she had used drugs, wiped tears from her eyes as she spoke about the scrutiny she had faced.
© Photo: Getty ImagesNigella opened up about her divorce from Charles Saatchi
"I'm not an innocent. I understand how it works," she said. "I just don't involve myself. I don't speak and I don't comment.
"I could say things and be indiscreet but I don't want to.
"The real truth is if you don't read things and don't get too involved, it doesn't enter your bloodstream. If it doesn't enter your bloodstream, you are not contaminated.
"What I have found is it has given me a far too sensitised reaction to newspapers. We all like gossiping in our own lives, so I don't take a lofty view. I just perhaps feel having had a layer of skin removed, I am more sensitive to other people's fortunes."
