paris

Paris Jackson talks Michael Jackson's death: 'I lost the only thing that has ever been important to me'

By Sarah Walker

January 25, 2017

Paris Jackson has given an emotional interview to Rolling Stone about her life after losing her father, Michael Jackson. Looking beautiful on the magazine’s cover in a yellow sweater and black gloves that are reminiscent of her dad’s from his Bad days, the 18-year-old spoke openly about the questions she’s received about her being Michael’s biological daughter.

Paris opened up to Rolling Stone about the death of her father

"He is my father. He will always be my father. He never wasn't, and he never will not be. People that knew him really well say they see him in me, that it’s almost scary… I consider myself black. [Michael] would look me in the eyes and he’d point his finger at me and he’d be like, ‘You’re black. Be proud of your roots.’ And I’d be like, ‘OK, he’s my dad, why would he lie to me?’ So I just believe what he told me. ‘Cause, to my knowledge, he’s never lied to me."

She went on to say she still struggles to come to terms with her father’s passing. The singer died in 2009 from an accidental prescription drug overdose. "They always say, 'Time heals,'" she noted. "But it really doesn't. You just get used to it. I live life with the mentality of 'OK, I lost the only thing that has ever been important to me.' So going forward, anything bad that happens can't be nearly as bad as what happened before. So I can handle it."

She added the hitmaker often visits her in her dreams: "I feel him with me all the time."

Paris at her father's funeral in 2009

On a positive note, the teen talked openly about how she has overcome many of the struggles she faced while in high school — a time that was full of "low self-esteem, thinking that I couldn't do anything right." After spending some time at a therapeutic hospital in Utah, she says she feels like a different person.

Michael Jackson passed away from an accidental overdose

"I was crazy. I was actually crazy. I was going through a lot of, like, teen angst. And I was also dealing with my depression and my anxiety without any help,” she told the publication. Now sober, she feels like she’s grown up. Her goal now is to use her name and fame for change.

"I was born with this platform," she said. "Am I gonna waste it and hide away? Or am I going to make it bigger and use it for more important things?" On what her dad would think, she noted he always used to say, "If you wanna be bigger than me, you can. If you don't want to be at all, you can. But I just want you to be happy." So it's safe to say that Michael would be proud.

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