Kristen Bell as Joanne, wearing a fair isle Ralph Lauren cardigan

4 love lessons I learned from Netflix's Nobody Wants This

HELLO!'s Second Act Rosie Green says Adam Brody's new show will help us fall back in love with dating

By: Rosie Green

October 3, 2024Oct 3, 2024, 5:30 PM GMT+1

Heart pulverizingly tough, yet all kinds of magical. Like anyone who has ever downloaded a matchmaking app, I know these paradoxical emotions come with dating.

And they are at the heart of a new, incredibly watchable Netflix series Nobody Wants This. Starring the hilarious, elfin Kristen Bell as perennially single Joanne and handsome Adam Brody as the respectful, thoughtful, charming Noah, it charts their against-the-odds romance.

Joanne is a podcaster who has previously dated unavailable, unsuitable men. Noah is a (hot) rabbi whose family would much rather he marry a nice Jewish girl. These sub 30-minute episodes (deliciously short!) are packed with humour and pathos. Perfect autumn watching - it being cuffing season and all.

Will Nobody Wants This return for season 2? — Nobody Wants This has charmed viewers

Whilst Joanne and Noah's LA houses and Hollywood good looks are absolutely not real life, what feels relatable to me is their age (44) and the universality of their dating experiences.

In the first episode, we see Noah's girlfriend Rebecca so desperate to get married she breaks into his drawer, finds his grandmother's ring and just starts wearing it. It prompts him to break up with her. It's an example of the show's sensitive lens that, rather than make her a figure of fun, her behaviour is seen with compassion.

More from Rosie

The show also has an insightful take on why we opt for certain people even though they don't make us happy. Erin Foster, the series creator says when she met her husband, Simon Tikhman in 2018, she realised "finding the right person can be hard."

"When you're with the wrong person, everything is their fault," said Foster. "You pick someone who's cheating and lying and disrespecting you and it's like you're perfect. When someone shows up who is healthy and accountable, you start to realise all the things that you do that are bad in a relationship."

DISCOVER: Nobody Wants This is a real-life 'love letter' from Erin Foster to her husband

Whatever your age or stage, whether you live in LA or Lancashire, it seems we all grapple with the same dating dilemmas. Here are a few the show throws up.

There are obstacles

Newsflash there will always be hurdles to love. And sorry to say, but as you get older, they will have accumulated. Kids, finances, distance, backgrounds. It's navigating them with self-reflection, calmness and generosity that will make the difference.

Nobody Wants This is a realistic portrayal of midlife dating

There are defence mechanisms

You have to spend time and effort working out what yours are. There's a touching scene where Joanne struggles to open up to Noah. Eventually she tells him it's because her mum was overly emotional and needy and she thinks that's what pushed her dad away.

READ: Navigating 'exhausting' midlife dating – from people who have been there

There are exes

Always. Unless you are 16 or have been living in a nunnery/monastery, respectively. Early on, Noah's ex ends up in hospital and it means he doesn’t text Joanne for a crucial few hours. It takes poise and self-restraint to navigate past this. It also gives Joanne the killer line. "She broke her wrist for attention. It was a very high-level move. I respect it."

Kristen Bell wearing khaki trousers, striped top and red jacket on Nobody Wants This — Midlife dating can be a minefield

There is 'the ick'

Joanne gets the ick when Noah turns up at her parents' house with flowers and wearing a 'sport coat.'

We've all been there, when your beloved arrives in something sartorially terrible (I'm thinking flammable football top) or is goofy in front of your friends. This requires self-reflection from you and confidence from them. Noah handles it well and says: "You can self-sabotage all you want, but I think you should get over it."

Love midlife? Join Second Act today!

blonde woman in a pink jumper holding her head — Say HELLO! to your Second Act

HELLO! originally launched its Second Act hub to reframe midlife and beyond as a celebratory, exciting new chapter full of endless possibilities. From inspirational tales of women who refuse to fade into the background, to valuable advice on navigating relationships, finances and health issues – we've featured them all. And such has been the overwhelmingly positive response from readers, we are now turning the hub into a FULL and FREE community where women like you can come together to shape something truly inspiring.

The cornerstones of the community will be two brand new newsletters. One monthly and one weekly. We are really excited about the monthly newsletter which will be themed and written by one of our roster of leading Second Act voices, including our editor at large, Rosie Green. The content will be reserved exclusively for Second Act subscribers.

We are also launching a monthly mentoring series, in the form of a five-minute video sent directly to your inbox featuring financial professionals, hormone specialists, life coaches and more. Again, it will be reserved exclusively for subscribers.

Below we have listed the inaugural benefits, and more will be added as we grow and shape the community. If you wish to help us shape our community, please take part in our one-slide survey here.