Andrea McLean has opened up about her crippling battle with anxiety, which left her feeling "suicidal".
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Writing in a column for Daily Mail, the Loose Women panellist - who is known for speaking openly about her life and wellbeing - recalled the terrifying moment happened whilst she was getting ready to attend the National Television Awards in January.
"I knew it would be too loud, too much. Instead, I got into my party dress alone and cried in the car all the way there," she said. "I posed for two pictures on the red carpet, then literally ran away from the cameras. As soon as I possibly could, I slipped out and left."
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"The stress became physical," she added. "I was throwing up. Not sleeping. Consumed with anxiety. At my lowest point, I was suicidal. This is the first time I've admitted that."
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The 50-year-old had been struggling with her anxiety for months, leaving her struggling to breathe at times. She even broke down in front of her Loose Women makeup artist ahead of a show.
Andrea also recalled an argument she had with her husband Nick Feeney, which became too overwhelming for her. The TV star was unable to open up to her partner, and her two children, Finlay, 18, and 13-year-old Amy, about her struggle.
© Photo: Getty ImagesThe Loose Women star has severe anxiety
"I thought they would be ashamed that I'd been so weak. I lay on the floor of my room and sobbed," she explained. "Then the next day I got up, went to work, put on a smile and knocked it out of the park at a meeting. No one would ever have known." Andrea has since started visiting a psychotherapist, which has helped with her mental health.
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"My anxiety hasn't disappeared entirely," she said. "I still have days when I'm too scared to push myself or jump into the unknown; when I feel overwhelmed by life and so depressed that the world feels like a dark, horrible, pointless place."
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