A scroll of my Instagram feed a few years back would have shown more girls in bikinis than on the pages of FHM, and countless ladies in Lycra.
No, I wasn’t having my gay awakening in my late twenties, I was following these accounts for "fitspo".
I relied on the photos of these tanned, toned women to inspire me to hit the gym or dissuade me from snacking.
© InstagramI wasn't the only one. My friend told me she had a photo of Nicole Scherzinger pinned to her fridge to remind her not to grab a snack, while the hashtag #Fitspo on Instagram has over 72 million posts.
Years went by with my feed flooded with these women, but slowly, I realised they weren't inspiring me, they were making me feel bad about myself. I didn't look at their gym photo shoots or beach poses and feel motivated to work out. Instead, I felt low that I didn't look like them, no matter how much time I spent pounding the treadmill or how little I ate.
Older and wiser, I now know that a fitness influencer and I could follow the same regime, the same eating plan and still not look the same. But that's not the only reason fitspo doesn’t work.
Why doesn't fitspo work?
"Fitspo doesn't work because it's essentially diet culture dressed up in workout gear," says psychotherapist Lauren Baird. "Those so-called motivational sayings such as, 'Strong is the new skinny' and 'No pain, no gain' seem inspiring on the surface, but they promote a dangerous myth that being 'fit' equals being slim, small, ripped… and that there's one specific 'look' to be healthy.
"The reality is, health doesn't have an appearance: we know from extensive research that people of diverse body shapes and sizes can be healthy. When we pin celebrity photos to our fridge or save Instagram posts of 'fit' bodies as inspiration, we're not actually motivating ourselves - we're setting up an unattainable ideal that disregards our unique body composition, genetics, and lifestyle."
READ: How I repaired my relationship with exercise
Feeling bad about ourselves
I know that seeing post upon post of idealised bodies made me feel bad about myself, and Lauren explains that this is down to shame. "That deep, visceral feeling that 'I'm bad' or 'I'm not good enough.'"
"Every time you're scrolling through the fitspo content, you're strengthening neural pathways that link self-worth to your appearance. This constant exposure to digitally enhanced, carefully curated bodies creates a whole new perception in your mind of what a 'fit' body looks like, completely distorting your perception of what real bodies, in all their shapes and sizes, look like.
"When your body doesn't meet this ideal, it can make you think, 'There's something wrong with me' and this triggers our body's stress response system. Research by Dickerson, Gruenewald, and Kemeny (2004) shows that shame specifically activates our threat response system, increasing inflammatory activity in the body through heightened cortisol production.
"This biological response to social threat and comparison has been well-documented - studies have found that social-evaluative threat situations, like comparing our bodies to idealised images, lead to elevated cortisol responses (Lupis, Sabik, & Wolf, 2016)."
READ: Why it really doesn't matter if you skipped your workout today – according to a PT
Lauren notes the irony is that while 'fitspo' claims to promote health, the shame and stress it creates can actually harm both our mental and physical well-being.
Finding motivation elsewhere
Lauren suggests that instead of seeking motivation through comparison, fitspo shaming and body modification, you can find "more adaptive, nurturing ways to connect with your body."
She recommends: "Exercise and move your body in ways that are nurturing and caring. Lean into more intuitive ways of finding movement that feels caring and nurturing for your body."
1. Reject diet culture
"Fitspo is diet culture in workout gear," Lauren cautions. "Unfollow or mute accounts that promote this and follow accounts of all body sizes and shapes. After all, as women, there is so much diversity in terms of the different shapes and sizes that we have."
READ: How rejecting clothing sizes made me happier
2. Workout without the pressure of weight loss
"Ask yourself if you would still do this workout if it meant no changes to your appearance. Movement can be about joy, stress relief, improved mood, or simply feeling good in your body."
© Getty3. Focus on how you feel
"Research shows that exercise improves health and can be just as effective as anti-depressants regardless of whether our body shape changes. Focus on how movement makes you feel rather than how it makes you look. Find activities that bring you genuine pleasure - whether that's dancing, walking in nature, or playing with your kids."
4. Practice body neutrality
"Move the focus from being about how your body looks, and instead focus on what incredible things your body does for you."
READ: 3 body acceptance experts share how they learned to appreciate themselves
5. Practice self-compassion
"That doesn’t need to see you proclaiming that you love your body, it can simply be tending and caring for your body like you would a friend. Noticing when you are suffering and leaning into support yourself.
When we can move away from the shame-based motivation of 'fitspo' and toward a more compassionate relationship with our bodies, we not only feel better mentally but also create a more sustainable approach to health and movement."
READ: I'm 34 - why am I still expected to look how I did when I was 18?
6. Tap into your body's signals
"Notice when you're hungry, tired, or need rest. This strengthens your interoception - the ability to sense and interpret internal bodily signals through the vagus nerve - and helps rebuild the vital connection between mind and body. The best version of you doesn't need to be smaller or fitter - it can be exactly as you are right now, moving your body in ways that feel good and align with your values."
