Parents, grandparents and carers… have you ever been out with your young children and wished a fellow parent would stop and help you out, be it on a bad day for a friendly chat or if you desperately need something like a nappy or baby wipes?
Psychotherapist and mum-of-three Anna Mathur realised there was a need for this kind of community support and kindness between parents, and came up with the fantastic idea of the Mum Ribbon Movement, sharing the details on Instagram.
All you have to do is tie a ribbon – any type or colour – to your bag as a sign that you are happy to give and receive help.
Anna, 37, from Surrey, whose children are aged four, six and eight, has since been flooded with appreciative messages and stories of mums joining the movement with ribbons on their bags. Celebrity mums have also got on board with the clever idea.
Model Daisy Lowe commented: "Absolute legend thank you," while TV presenter Kate Silverton wrote: "Love this idea @annamathur we all need to be there for each other."
Julia Bradbury posted: "Brilliant idea. We're always in such a rush at the school gates. I'm not there regularly because of work, so I don't know all the Mums very well and feel a bit of an imposter when I'm there. This will really help."
Actresses Hayley Tamaddon and Ali Bastian also liked the Mum Ribbon Movement post.
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© Charlotte GrayAnna Mathur told HELLO! how the movement started...
"It was a Friday night and I shared a story on my Instagram Stories about how I had a classic parenting moment in the high street. The kids were kicking off and I felt totally depleted. You know those moments where you think, I don't actually know what to do, I've got nothing to give. I was deep breathing so I didn't lose my cool in a very public way, and I was just frantically looking around, hoping to see a familiar face – someone who could just come and give me a hug and ask me if I was alright, who I'd probably cry on. But there wasn't anyone.
"I saw families and grannies and thought, there's probably someone thinking, 'She's having a hard time, I wish I could go and help her.' I know this because I feel it... I want to help but don't want the person to feel I'm patronising them or for them to take offence. I've been rebuffed before. There's a conflict – you know people need helping and you want to help, but there's this barrier.
"So I shared that. I said, 'Wouldn't it be amazing if there was some sort of sign that we wouldn't bite someone's head off if they offered to help us, but also that we are available for someone to come to us?'
"People are hungry for these little opportunities to connect with each other and not feel alone. The ribbon is a way to start a conversation."
"We all have these moments, it's just often we look around and see strangers. They'd probably be up for helping but are worried about approaching. And the concept of the village... we don't really have a village anymore because everyone's so spread out, and I think our fear of offending each other is dismantling this village that we need.
"So the next day I shared the idea about the ribbon. It's something simple that I thought people had in their homes. I found some I had from Christmas, and I thought, let's just see how this goes. It could either go well or totally flop."
Anna says she's been inundated by messages from people. "The overwhelming response has been that people are so happy they have permission to offer someone help.
"There are people putting up posters about it at baby groups and in doctors waiting rooms. Craft businesses are giving out ribbons. Grandmas are sewing hooks onto ribbons and giving them out in their high street. People have told me they've started seeing ribbons on bags out and about, which is lovely.
"It's gone wild! It just shows that people are hungry for these little opportunities to connect with each other and not feel alone. The ribbon is a way to start a conversation."
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So what's the ultimate goal of the movement?
Anna explains: "I would love for it to be a thing that's done everywhere. It would be wonderful to do a ribbon walk every month in a different location. You may not know anyone but we're all meeting in that same vein, it's about being open to connect."
On Anna's Instagram page, her followers have shared some heartwarming comments.
One mum said: "This is such a simple but brilliant idea! It would have helped me so much when I was a young mum & now as a grandma to be, I often see mums struggling & wonder if I should offer to help, but am too worried in case I offend them or I'm overstepping the mark."
Another wrote: "As a VERY involved Nanny I think this is wonderful. And I urge women of my age to offer this hand of solidarity too. Parents supporting parents. Women supporting women. It’s that simple."
A third posted: "I love this! Added to both my daily bag with the kids and my camera bag. Even if just one person approaches and is helped, it will be worth it. The conversation around helping a fellow parent generated by this post alone is so valuable."
And it seems the Mum Ribbon Movement is spreading around the globe. One follower told Anna: "I love this. Hopefully it becomes a thing everywhere. Happy to have my ribbon in Toronto."
If you want to join in with the Mum Ribbon Movement, simply take any ribbon and tie it to your bag to invite and offer support to fellow mums.
Anna Mathur is a psychotherapist, Sunday Times Bestselling Author and hosts The Therapy Edit Podcast
