In my head, I'm a festival babe. A free-spirited, dance-till-dawn type who loves sleeping under canvas, embracing living off grid and being nonchalant about whether I have washed for multiple days. If this is you, I'm in awe, because the only element of festivals I like is the fashion.
I pore over the pap shots. See who is wearing what. I like the ease of the outfits, the happy feel, the sunshine filled optimism. I like the coolness and the rock 'n' roll vibes.
It makes me flashback to the iconic Glastonbury looks. Sienna Miller in 2004 wearing a studded low-slung belt, flirty mini black dress and a floppy hat. Kate Moss in 2005 sporting a super short gold dress, Hunter wellies and accessorised by Pete Doherty. Alexa Chung in thigh-skimming denim shorts and a crisp (ish) white striped shirt.
My obvious devotion to festival fashion and a lifetime spent on glossy magazines have given me insight into what works best when going for this look. And good news, it's achievable if you are 15 or 50 and whether you are going camping or staying put.
You know where I’ll be…
Any-age festival fashion essentials
Short shorts
I know these put the fear of God into anyone post thirty but a) life is too short and b) these ones by Wyse, £95, are short enough to feel daring, but not so high up the thigh people see what you’ve had for dinner. The scalloped edge adds a nice femininity and I can vouch that they are flattering.
Chunky footwear
If you are going to wear shorts, a flirty thigh-skimming mini or a wafty dress, then solid, utilitarian footwear is essential for balance. Whilst Chloé's 'Jeanette Studded Platform' clogs, £990, at Net-A-Porter are on my wish list, Penelope Chilvers 'High Horse Bit Leather Clogs' are also very beautiful and are in the sale at £84.
Oversized glasses
These are back in. Hallelujah. Thank God because not only do they look ultra-glamorous in a 1970s rock chic way, but they are practical too (hiding the hangover/lack of sleep). Check out Gucci Tortoiseshell Chunky Square, £290 at John Lewis.
READ: I've finally got time for style now my kids are older – but which fashion tribe do I belong to?
Dry shampoo
Another multitasker. This product gives hair that dishevelled undone texture that is synonymous with cool girl festival style. It also soaks up oil and nixes unpleasant smells to mean you can stretch time between washes and not have to brave the showers. Living Proof is the best I’ve found for odour removal. £14 for travel size at Space NK.
Boho blouse
The cream Chloé dupe that Sienna Miller designed for her M&S collaboration might be sold out, but I think the pure cotton striped shirt is even better.
It will look great tucked into shorts or teamed with denim flares, £35.