At 60, my life looked great to the outside world. I ran marathons, climbed mountains, had my own business and a lovely home. I was a decent mother and wife. I had friends and family that cared for me.
But underneath my cheery exterior, I was lost, scared and anxious. I didn't see any joy in anything and I knew it was alcohol that was causing it.
I'd always enjoyed drinking socially – alcohol was the magic elixir that turned me from introvert to extrovert - but my drinking had started taking over my life and I preferred to drink alone at home rather than go out with friends.
I was having a small wine at 10am to calm my anxiety and I could no longer deny I had a problem. Drink became a thing to take the edge of life and it dawned on me that it was no longer my choice, but something that I needed. There was no rock bottom that pushed me to quit, just a multitude of lows.
I'd promised myself I'd give up or cut down so many times and always failed, but on this occasion, I stuck with it.
Here's what I've found since quitting drinking at 60.
1. Emotions will come up
In the years I've been sober I've contended with emotions that should have been dealt with years ago. It is no exaggeration to say this has been the happiest and saddest, most connected and lonely time of my life.
2. You have the right to say no
Since quitting drinking, I've felt okay with simply saying 'no' for the first time ever.
When I first gave up drinking, I accepted invitations that put me in a vulnerable position to show people that I was still fun and that nothing had changed, despite no longer drinking.
These social occasions put me on edge and I didn't enjoy them. I felt a great sense of relief once I started turning down boozy invites or leaving after an hour with no excuse or apology
3. I am busier than ever
I have a new lease of life since I quit drinking, and I often feel there are not enough hours in the day to do everything I want to do and to learn everything I want to learn.
I wasted so much time hungover or drunk and I know I missed opportunities where I could have excelled if the drink hadn't come first, but I'm setting that right now.
ADVICE: Ask a life coach: How can I cut back on drinking?
4. I'm looking after myself more
Since I quit alcohol, I'm focusing on looking after myself from the inside out with nutrition, supplements, rest, yoga, walking, running and even having a nap during the day if I'm exhausted.
If I do go out with friends to a party or pub I leave when I want to, not when I think it's the acceptable time. I used to call such behaviour selfish, now I know I come first and anyone who doesn't understand can't be a part of my life right now.
5. I've found peace
I feel at peace in just about any situation. Simple things such as walking through a wood, smelling cut grass and staring at the ocean bring me immense happiness that I don't remember feeling for a long while.
Sobriety is the most important thing in my life. I can see everything with clear eyes and life is about taking time with highs and lows to come to terms with the new peaceful life of sober living.
READ: 10 of the best alcohol-free and low alcohol drinks
6. I'm overjoyed that I don't drink
When I cut out alcohol, I didn't want to spend my life missing drinking and feeling like I was missing out. I wanted to be overjoyed that it wasn't in my life.
Drinking stopped me seeing so much colour. I missed so many beautiful mornings and evening sunsets, but since going sober at sixty and with life still to live, I've found that the love I have for myself means I feel joy all around.