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Why you should absolutely treat yourself this Valentine's Day

Partner or not, there's a science-approved reason why you really deserve a treat this Valentine's Day

Melanie Macleod
Wellness Editor
February 10, 2024
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Love it or loathe it, Valentine's Day can't be ignored. The M&S Two Can Dine deal is already on the shelves and florists' windows are full of red roses.

But whether you're loved-up or living your best single life, you really ought to treat yourself this Valentine's Day. Why? Because buying ourselves a little treat, be it a coffee, a bunch of flowers or something bigger, gives us a dopamine hit and studies show that treating ourselves leaves us feeling less exhausted and with a greater sense of happiness and life satisfaction - if that’s not a case for a treat, we don’t know what is!

There are different kinds of treats, according to neuroscientist Dr. Tara Swart, who says that there are reward treats, to inspire us to keep going when we're finding something difficult, and resilience treats - the little things you treat yourself to at the end of a hard or horrible day, to encourage us that better days are coming.

Carefree mother Black ethnicity sitting on the sofa woth her son and eating chocolate© Getty
Chocolate is a lovely treat!

Treats for resilience 

If you're fresh from heartbreak or feel eternally single, you might find Valentine's Day a challenge – and this is where resilience treats, such as a bubbly bath or a glass of wine, come in.

Resilience treats are acts of self-kindness that according to Tara, say: "Today didn’t go well, but I'm going to do something nice for myself to help to keep me resilient and get up the next day and make it a better day."

They are an act of self-care because life isn’t good all the time, and they can be restorative too. "When I treat myself to a bath with essential oils, I know I’m doing something for myself to reduce my stress levels, which will make me feel happier on a whole different level than something that I buy myself," says Dr. Tara.

Cropped shot of an unrecognizable young woman relaxing with a book and a cup of coffee on her bed at home© Getty
Lighting candles is a little treat

Treats as a reward

Reward treats are the goodies we buy ourselves to acknowledge our success – relevant on Valentine's Day if you've got through the mushiest day of the year without feeling too sorry for yourself!

These treats remind us to acknowledge our achievements and pay homage to our accomplishments, no matter if they're as small as staying upbeat if you're finding V-Day depressing.

DISCOVER: Why me-time is essential for a healthy, happy relationship 

Treats in trying times

In difficult financial times, it might seem frivolous to buy yourself a treat just because the calendar reads February 14th, but Tara points out that treats don't have to cost a lot of money.

A long bath at the end of the day or a phone call with a friend are just as much treats as popping something in your virtual basket.

A woman perches on the side of an elegant red roll top bathtub.© Catherine Falls Commercial
A bath is a great way to treat yourself

If you do decide to spend money on your treat, look for something that lasts a while, suggests Tara. A luxury bath oil or candle will be a treat every time you use it, recreating that dopamine hit again and again, resulting in sustained happiness.

"A really nice shower gel that smells lovely is fun when you buy it, but it’s also great because every single time you use it in the shower it’ll make you smile," says Dr. Tara. "It’s connected to the moment of joy when you purchased it, and it stays in your life for a longer period of time."

However you spend Valentine's Day this year, promise us you'll treat yourself in some way…

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